Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Bike Shop Blues

I love my bike shop.  The guys in there are awesome, they are super helpful and don't treat you like an idiot.  

I happened to stop in another bike shop this week because I was driving by and needed a tube, some CO2, some chain lube, and maybe a new tire.  The one that flatted at the LADU last weekend is usable for now, but needs to be replaced before a rock or something works its way into the gash.  I guess I ran over something nasty.

I hate to not be completely 100% loyal to my shop, but when you live in Caratunk, you take advantage of any opportunity to get things you need.  I needed bike stuff, and there as I was driving for work, I saw a bike shop. Cool.

The shop was nice, and I had grabbed my CO2, spent some time picking out a tire (looking for guarantee not to flat on label, couldn’t find it, ha), and had collected a spare tube.  I was contemplating the chain lube when the bike guy came up to me.

“Can I help you?”

Now, I always feel funny telling a guy I am just looking for some lube.  But that is what I told him.  Then I giggled, because really I am just a 12 year old boy inside.

I guess I shouldn’t need help with this, but really, there was like 2,000 different kinds of lube there, in all these colors and types, I had no idea what I should get. All I wanted was to clean and lube my chain because, well, it is it time.  I don’t know the difference between wax lube verses synthetic verses blah blah blah lube.  I actually really don’t even care.  I just want something that works.

In my bike shop, the guys would have laughed with me about the lube, then grabbed something and said something like, “This is what we use here.”  Good enough for me, I am not looking for a dissertation on lubes, I just want something that works.

Not this guy, he didn't even crack a smile about the lube (I am giggling right now).  He was like a commercial for Bubba Gump Shrimp Company.  “Well you got your wax lube, you got your synthetic lube, you got your green lube, you got…So and so likes this, and do do likes this and ya ya uses this...”

You get the picture. 

He kept talking, trying to educate me on the finer points of the various types of lube.  I finally grabbed something that looked right and the guy told me it was a good choice because of blah blah chain runs smoothly blah blah.  Yeah, OK good. Thanks dude.

Then he looked at the tire I grabbed and asked, “Why did you get that tire? The color?”

I wanted to hit him over the head with the black and red tire, but I said, “No, it says resists cutting, it is the right size, I like the look of the tread.  Plus, you don’t really have much for choices for road bike tires.”

He grabbed the tire from my hand.

“You don’t want that tire.”

Oh! I don't? That is good because I really thought that was what I wanted, but I guess I must be stupid. Thank you for saving me from myself.

He sticks a different tire in my hand and asks me what kind of riding I am doing, I tell him.  He says THIS tire is the bomb, super tough, a little rougher ride but much less likely to get a flat.  It was also about $30 more, was the wrong size, and although it said resists cutting as well, it had a hybrid type tread on it.

I didn't want it, and I told him as much, but he was pretty sure I did.

This schmo was either treating me like a stupid girl or trying to impress me.  I don’t know which.  I hope it is the second option, because the first one just makes him a jerk, and my ego could really use the boost.

I ended up getting the tube, CO2, and the lube.  I told him I would have to wait on the tire.  I am going to wait until I get to my shop to get the tire, the heck with that guy.  I wouldn't have gotten anything but I really like to have 2 spare tubes and 3 CO2's, and my chain was kind of blackish. 


Emz said...

so crazy. I hate feeling like this when I KNOW WHAT I WANT. I think this way his lame way of impressing/hitting on you. super lame though.

Kat said...

I hate when things like that happen! We only have 3 bike shops in my area (I've only been to 2 of them), and one of them is just like that. I was NOT impressed. Just for kicks, I went to both of them to see about getting sized for a bike and came away with two completely different opinions. My next mission is to go to the 3rd shop, which is fairly new, and see how they are. Hopefully I'll have better luck!

Matty O said...

HAHAHA LOVE the lube comment, I would have had to catch my breath if I heard that come out of a girl whether in the bike shop or not!

My wife complains about being treated like a girl a lot... even though she knows more about car engines than I ever will... she gets pissed going to an auto parts store for me. Don't get me wrong, I still work on the cars, she just grew up with a genius grease monkey of a dad.

I vote he was trying to impress you, after all if Caratunk is as small as you say, he has a small pool of women to choose from, let alone ones that ride as well as you do and are into lube! (hmmm I guess that could be taken a couple different ways haha)

skierz said...

gotta love that guy who knows everything! stick it buddy! I will take my lube and get out of here! (I am giggling now to)

Unknown said...

I really hate it when salesmen do that! It brings out the bad girl in me...I just have to wind them up some way! Haha.

Just for info ;)

Rock N Roll chain lube, cleans and lubes brilliantly, no rocket science necessary. Big plus, cheap.

I use Continental 650C tyres - the Grand Prix 4000s, they have a Kevlar coating inside, and don't break the bank. They also don't melt on European roads when the temperature gets above yesterday.

Patrick Mahoney said...

I'm sorry but whenever someone mentions a guarantee I think about this line from Tommy Boy.

"Because they know all they sold ya was a guaranteed piece of shit. That's all it is, isn't it? Hey, if you want me to take a dump in a box and mark it guaranteed, I will. I got spare time. But for now, for your customer's sake, for your daughter's sake, ya might wanna think about buying a quality product from me."

Big Daddy Diesel said...

I was waiting for you to say "I took his tire and smacked him on the back of his head with it and left without buying anything"

He is lucky that (my new favorite movie line) you didnt press the start button on the whoop a$$ machine

misszippy said...

People like that are exhausting. Takes all the fun away!

KovasP said...

You had me at lube.

Regina said...

Lube. Ha ha ha! Maybe he just wanted someone to talk you said, it's Caratunk.

This post made me laugh though, you are funny. Btw, I laugh when my 4 y/o farts...I'm sort of too juvenile to be anyone's mother.

Christi said...

Man that guy does sound like a jerk! I probably would have walked away but I am stubborn like that!

Ron said...

huhuhuhuh lube. She said lube. Not even a smirk? Thats ridiculous. So should we be expecting a post on the finer points of lube?

Unknown said...

Hey Mandy,

The lube joke was awesome. If I was the sales guy you and me would have made jokes about it for 20 minutes and laughed like Beavis and Butthead.

The vendor was porbably offering a SPiFF to employees who sold a certain tire brand. Based on this dudes sales skills he probably really needed the SPIFF!

Alexa said...

I giggle whenever I have to talk about lube as well! that guy sounds like a douche.

Julie said...

Your so crazy:) I love it!

Maria said...

Good for you for not buying something you didn't want. What you should have done was start making up really important sounding words when talking about a random bike object and then when he asked you what that was, just shake your head and mumble to yourself that you thought all bike enthusiasts knew what the ligustrum vulgare was, seeing how it important it is to the tire. That would have gotten him!

Aimee said...

Ugh..I'm sorry you had to deal with that guy! I would have laughed about the lube too! Ha ha.

AM! said...

good post! i'm chucklin' envisioning his' bubba gump rant on lubes and tubes!;-)

and i too *heart* bike shops. somethin' about them;-)

Caratunk Girl said...

EMZ, skiertz, Zippy, Julie - Thanks! There are good and not so good bike shops out there, that is for sure.

KJ - good luck on the 3rd shop!

Matty O - I know your wife fixes the cars too. :)

JM - Thanks for the tips, I will look into those tires, I already have my lube...he he

Patrick - THANK YOU for the Tommy Boy quote - love it!

BDD - you called it pretty good, he almost got hit over the head. I was stuck cause I really needed a few things, but I wasn't desperate for a tire.

Kovas - he he he he

Regina - I think we would get along famously. I would laugh when your 4yr old farts too.

Christi - yeah, I came close, but really needed that spare tube!

Ron - I KNOW! I got nothing. Not even a wink!

Jeff - ha, the Beavis and Butthead reference is a good one. he he he. Yeah, I am sure he needed a SPIFF, but I almost gave him a...a...a..what rimes with SPIFF and means ass-kicking?

Alexa - yeah me too!

Maria - HA! I wish I thought of that, it would have been awesome!!

Aimee - YEAH, I know, I thought the lube thing was funny too.

Anne Marie - Glad I made you giggle!

Jon said...

The nerve that guy had!!!

Just saw ur comment about heading up to Lake Placid to volunteer. We should definately get together. Drop me an email at campbell(dot)jon(at)gmail(dot)com.

DRog said...

this is hilarious
Im going to re read the lube section again for another laugh that was hilarious, and I am the same way...dont want to dont care to know just gimme what is needed! Great that you do have options to get what you need in Caratunk and a bike shop you love thats awesome...fer sure get back with them!

Jennifer said...

People like that make me crazy! But it is good to laugh it off. Very funny post!

adena said...

I am having much trouble finding a conveniently located bike shop. There is one I like but it's a bit of a pain to get to. The last one I went to seemed good but when I tried to exchange a bike pump that didn't seem to work they treated me like an idiot. I told them if it were only me I would certainly agree to user error but my coach and her husband couldn't even get it to work.

Still laughing at the gump comment.. hahahahah

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